it's not quite what i thought it would be

i guess i think too highly of myself sometimes, rather, too often

i thought i would be in a controlling position over all the things around

but things often prove me wrong

and i just never learn from the experience

or....it is just that i simply do not want to accept the fact??

it is frustrating when things do not happen in the way i want them to be

and it is more frustrating when things get out of hand, in an unpredictable manner

just wish they do not turn into disasters at the end

i have only myself to blame for all these unnecessary and silly thoughts

(((sometimes i wonder am i worrying too much...hmm...i guess i am)))

haha....what an idiotic behaviour

i am mumbling....grumbling...

not to worry about me .....  

i am just acting like a fool

talking nonsense to myself

spouting things that i myself not quite sure what they are

i am just trying to get things off my head by venting the frustration

yeah...that is what i am doing....

silly creature